Whenever I do marriage counseling the first question I ask the couple that I am counseling is this:
Why do you want to get married?
The reason I ask this question is because of what we are told in Romans 8: 28&29 which reads as follows:
8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose. 8:29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate [to be] conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren. Romans 8:28-29 (Emphasis supplied).
When our purpose for marriage agrees with God’s purpose God will make sure that everything that happens in the lives of that couple will work for their good and for the good of that marriage. That’s right I said absolutely everything no matter how bad it may seem at the time. I know this because Romans 8:28&29 tells us that God has predestined the fact that His purpose for our lives will be accomplished no matter what. It also tells us that God’s purpose is that we be conformed to the image of His son, Jesus. Therefore, when a man and woman are joined in marriage to accomplish God’s purpose God will cause all things (the good and the bad) to work together to accomplish that purpose.
The question now becomes:
How does being conformed into the image of Jesus make my marriage better and me happier?
II Corinthians 5:17-19 gives the answer to that question. It says:
5:17 Therefore if any man [be] in Christ, [he is] a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 5:18 And all things [are] of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation; 5:19 To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation.
Those who agree with God’s purpose for marriage will surrender their will to Jesus daily so they can be conformed into His image more and more by the power of the indwelling of His Spirit. This is what makes all things new because now all things are of God instead of the flesh (II Corinthians 5:17&18): This is also what makes those who agree with and base their marriage on God’s purpose happier than those who do not because those who do agree with God’s purpose deal with every aspect of marriage from the prospective and power of God and not from the perspective and power of the flesh.
Next week I will begin to show how dealing with every aspect from the prospective and power of God makes all things new. I will start with most and important all which is love. Until then I leave you with this portion of scripture to ponder and pray over:
4:16 And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him. 4:17 Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world. 4:18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. I John 4:16-18 (Emphasis supplied).